Pioneering: Do We Really Need An Oregon Trail MOVIE?

Is Hollywood running out of ideas? Duh.

Since Battleship and Street Fighter did so well adapted as movies (/sarcasm), it only makes sense that we're getting a movie adaptation of an iconic Apple II game. Yes, The Oregon Trail is coming to the big screen.

The Oregon Trail...game

END (Credit: Oregon Trail.ws)

The Oregon Trail game is iconic, and you whippersnappers will never convince me otherwise. The game taught us critical thinking skills, problem-solving skills, and why you should NEVER ATTEMPT TO FORD A RIVER.

This image is still nerve-wracking (Credit: Oregon Trail.ws)

You also got to learn some history and geography. Fun fact: The Oregon Trail was originally a text-based game before getting published by...the Minnesota Educational Computing Consortium in 1975.

This looks just like downtown Minneapolis (Credit: Oregon Trail.ws)

The Oregon Trail...movie

Not a whole lot is known about what the movie adaptation will look like or who will star in it (probably Chris Pratt), but we do know that the movie will be an action-comedy with a few Barbie-esque musical numbers (i.e. SONGS) thrown in.

If "Dissin' Terry" isn't one of those songs I'M OUT AND I'M DISAPPOINTED.

We've only traveled 15 miles and we're already lost?! (Credit: Oregon Trail.ws)

Other Games That Should Get Movie Adaptations

While we're adapting old Apple II games for movies, we should consider other older games for the big screen.

Number Munchers: Chris Pratt stars as The Muncher: an obese math nerd who is forced to save the world by solving increasingly-difficult equations and then eating them. Sure.
ALF: The First Adventure: Chris Pratt voices the titular character who crashes onto Earth and must find parts to repair his spaceship. He's hunted by a government agent (played by Willem Defoe). Cats are terrified.
Kid Niki: Radical Ninja: Chris Pratt stars as Kid Niki: a totally radical (in the tubular sense) ninja-in-training who receives a mysterious note saying his girlfriend Margo (played by Jennifer Lawrence) has been kidnapped by the evil Stone Wizard (played by Willem Defoe).
Space Defender: starring - you guessed it - Chris Pratt as a wacky Space Force ensign who must defend his Star Base from an evil alien attack (every alien is voiced by Willem Defoe).
Tetris: I have no idea how this would get turned into a movie, but Chris Pratt will star and Willem Defoe will be the bad guy. Jennifer Lawrence is there, too.